A post has gone viral on Reddit after a woman claimed she asked her sister to give up her “passion” for rescuing dogs in order to care for her four children.
Redditor u/Throw_away_no374828 describes the situation in the subreddit “Am I The A**hole” in a post that has been voted more than 8,000 times and received more than 4,000 comments.
The Redditor explained that she has four children from 11 months to 10 years old. She said her sister is “child-free” and has loved watching the older kids to help the Redditor maintain her “sanity.”
“This has been extremely helpful and I always tell her how grateful we are for her help,” she said.
She wrote that the kids would normally go to her sister’s house, but lately she’s adopted dogs that make the arrangement impossible. She said after some time that she decided to ask her sister “flat” not to take in another dog so she could continue to help with childcare.
According to the ASPCA, approximately 6.3 million companion animals end up in U.S. animal shelters every year. About 3.1 million of those animals are dogs and 3.2 million are cats.
Although the organization estimates that the number of dogs and cats entering shelters has fallen from about 7.2 million in 2011, with the largest drop in dogs.
Education and adoption are important for these animals as approximately 920,000 animals are euthanized at the shelter each year, although this figure has also been declining since 2011.
The Redditor explained that rescuing dogs is her sister’s “passion”, so she knows she was asking “a lot.”
When she made the request, she said, she shared how difficult it has been since her sister was no longer able to care for her children.
“How little sleep I get each night, how not helping my husband as much as he should, and some other deeply personal issues I struggle with,” she wrote.
As her sister comforted her, she said she disagreed and said she needed time to think. The Redditor said that while she feels guilty, she has no one else to turn to for help.
“I can’t afford a long-term nanny, and my friends all have their own kids to take care of,” she said. “Most of all, my kids will always come for a dog and that’s why I was willing to ask.”
Commentators thought the Redditor’s request was unfair and that it was her responsibility to provide childcare for her own children.
“Absolutely no one likes admitting this to themselves, but your own life choices have brought you to this point,” said one commenter. “Your exhaustion, your sleepless nights, the fact that you’re broke, your inability to find a regular nanny… these are all problems you made up for yourself by having children beyond your means.”
“You choose to have children. She didn’t. You expect her to drop her life and things that are important to her to deal with your problems,” wrote another.
Others pointed out that her husband would have to bear more of the weight than it would fall on her sister.
“You stated that your husband doesn’t help with your kids as much as he should and your solution was to blame your sister for changing her doggy loving lifestyle (unpaid, I might add) so she can accommodate your kids more often, ‘ another commenter wrote. “You understand the problem, but talk to the wrong adult to solve it.”